11:50 a.m. - 12/30/01
i should know better than to read mess feeling as I do.
[nonsensical, euphemistically "poetic" communication resumed]
lesson number 4,678,900,350: not all dreams are for a future <--mess said
I nodded the way I do
when my brain beats around itself
trying to release the images of you
that hypnotize or haunt me
night after night
thoughts that veil your face;
they hang around your eyes
so that the closer I reach into you
the more disguised
you are
the girl whose gold hair my mother
no longer wants to recognize
she never saw through you to
the integrity, why should she
stop to mourn a girl she doesn't know
go
come into my pocket then
leave your little altar far behind
shake off the thoughts that shelter you
play within my mind
I miss you but I will not say so
as long as I risk remembering
you're gone...
<<chord
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